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Baltimore Beatdown Power Rankings, Week 14: Packers reign, Ravens Top 15

The NFL [Knowledge is] Power Rankings Week 14 edition.

Benny Sieu-USA TODAY Sports

Since almost every NFL outlet or website in the blogosphere posted their opinions on where-and-why the 32 teams stand after Week 14’s slate of games we've -- well, Daniel -- did something different. Introducing … the first edition of Beatdown’s Power Rankings in ... haiku format.

Again, there's a pool full of rankings and we dive in it:

1 – PACKERS (10-3) +1

Aaron Rodge and Co.,
Are Super Bowl favorites
No joke at Lambeau.

2 – PATRIOTS (10-3) -1

Belichick-mating
Whether chess or on the field,
no outsmarting Bill.

3 – BRONCOS (10-3) +1

Don’t you know by now
Defense wins championships
56.9.

4 – SEAHAWKS (9-4) +4

L.O.B. is back
Sanchez is an imposter?
Injury-free D.

5 – COLTS (9-4) +5

Resiliency
Pays off for the Colts offense
Amazing comeback.

6 – CARDINALS (10-3) -3

Bruce Arians. Hand
him the coach of the Year a-
ward already, sheesh.

7 – EAGLES (9-4) -1

Chip Kelly again
Taking the Eagles to Vic -
tory, no Michael.

8 – LIONS (9-4) +1

Do the Lions have
the tools to win in the play-
offs or pretending?

9 – COWBOYS (9-4) -4

DeMarco Murr-
ay could take this team pretty
Far up or far down.

10 – STEELERS (8-5) +2

Le’Veon Bell, wow
There anyone you’d rather
have in your backfield?

11 – BENGALS (8-4-1) EVEN

I’m more excited
for the #Rematch at Pittsburgh
Yes, Week 17

12 – CHARGERS (8-5) +6

Wild Card in their line
of sight will they push to make
the postseason, no.

13 – RAVENS (8-5) EVEN

Six sacks by Ravens
Dean Pees’ defense masterpiece
Versus Miami

14 – CHIEFS (7-6) -7

Needing a win they
Couldn’t overcome the Cards
Cold deck or misdeal?

15 – DOLPHINS -1 (7-6)

Why abandon run?
12 carries for Lamar Mill...
does not make much sense.

16 – BILLS (7-6) EVEN

Win the hard road games
No one will doubt your defense
close game no excuse.

17 – TEXANS (7-6) +3

Fitzpatrick’s son should
calculate the team’s odds of
make ‘16 Playoffs.

18 – 49ERS (7-6) -3

Yowzas for San Fran
Dapper-nick days are over
49ers, shrug.

19 – RAMS (6-7) EVEN

Every team in
NFC West deserves a
Wild Card berth this year?

20 – BROWNS (7-6) -3

Learn from Peyton Q-
B Ratings don’t mean much, lose
with 32 ticks.

21 – VIKINGS (6-7) +2

Winning in OT
is still a win, bubble screen
or not, the Jets stink.

22 – FALCONS (5-8) +5

Two hundred fifty
nine yards for Julio Jones
eleven catches

23 – PANTHERS (4-8-1) +2

Road to Super Bowl
requires a defense that the
Panthers destroyed Saints.

24 – SAINTS (5-8) -2

Turtle wins the race
Brees a truck driver saying
"See you in three weeks."

25 – GIANTS (4-9) -2

The G-men are proud
Rank higher than their rivals
Good luck with draft picks!

26 – BEARS (5-8) -2

Two game losing-streak,
there’s not really much to say.
Get well soon, Brandon!

27 – BUCCANEERS (2-11) -1

There’s always next year,
the pirates growl, there’s always
next season to reap.

28 – JETS (2-11) EVEN

I predicted that
they’d win in Minnesota
"Defend Bubble Screen"

#AddCourse

29 – RAIDERS (2-11) +2

Dear, dear the Rai-dears
Shocked us by waxing San Fran
24-13.

30 – REDSKINS (3-10) EVEN

Redskins need to change
Jersey color, team name or
front office, Snyder.

31 – TITANS (2-11) -2

Between the Titans
and Jags, I’m not sure who’s worse
Flip Two-Face’s coin.

32 – JAGUARS (2-11) EVEN

Looking forward to
Jaguars-Titans Thursday night
Matchup Week 16.

Rankings: 12345678910 | 11 | 12 | 13 |