By Jason Butt and Daniel Park
Daniel Park: I didn't take the lead but guess what?
Jason Butt: What?
DP: Chicken Butt!
JB: Grow up.
DP: That joke never gets old. Thanks to the retractable grappling gun I purchased (the same one Batman uses), I've pulled myself out of this dark pit and climbed aboard my editor's ship to seize once and for all. With last week's 10-3 performance, him and I are officially tied for the season at 90-55-1 apiece. I solemnly swear that I was sober when I selected the Panthers to swipe their Upset Cards against Mark Sanchez's Eagles. At least I didn't take the Bears and finish 8-5! (This is twice he's taken Chicago over Green Bay. What's with that?)
JB: The bizarre affinity I had for Marc Trestman's offense, which dated back to last season, is over. DONE! I don't want to talk about it anymore...
Park's take: The Dolphins are such a frustrating team to follow. Facts: wins over Oakland, Chicago, Jacksonville and San Diego isn't something you're bringing to this week's show and tell. No wonder Miami's defense versus the pass is ranked second in the league. But they looked bad in losses to the Chiefs, Packers, Lions and yes, the Bills. They might as well call in sick Thursday night. Watch for my man Marcell Dareus.
Park's pick: Bills 27, Dolphins 20
Butt's take: This Dolphins team has so much potential. Just when it looks like they're breaking out, they have a game such as last week's loss to the Lions. It's not looking good for Fred Jackson to play tonight, though. This game, the good Dolphins show up.
Butt's pick: Dolphins 24, Bills 17
Falcons at Panthers
Park's take: The Falcons are looking forward to their second win in two weeks. It's like that one time the girl I liked said, "Yes," to a second date. Only to come crashing back to reality. Poor Daniel Falcons. ‘Twas fun while it lasted.
Park's pick: Falcons 37, Panthers 17
Butt's take: Sure does suck being you, Park.
Butt's pick: Falcons 27, Panthers 20
Vikings at Bears
Park's take: Not only is this on the tip of my tongue, these next words are on the tips of my fingers: Jay Cutler's a washed-up quarterback. Jared Allen has registered 1.5 sacks this season but feasts on his former teammates.
Park's pick: Bears 24, Vikings 21
Butt's take: I will not make the same mistake I did last week. Repeat: I will not make the same mistake I did last week.
Butt's pick: Vikings 24, Bears 21
Park's take: Tashaun Gipson leads the league in interceptions with six. Not only has Ryan Fitzpatrick thrown eight interceptions, he's been sacked 20 times in 10 weeks. Ryan Mallett is up next. The rich get richer.
Park's pick: Browns 28, Texans 18
Butt's take: Ryan Mallett has all the tools to be a capable NFL quarterback. He just hasn't had the opportunity yet. This Sunday, he gets that shot against Joe Haden and Tashaun Gipson. He'll have better days than Sunday.
Butt's pick: Browns 26, Texans 14
Seahawks at Chiefs
Park's take: The Chiefs have a 12th man, too. His name is Andy Reid.
Park's pick: Chiefs 21, Seahawks 20
Butt's take: The Chiefs seem to rise to the occasion in big home games. Not this time. Seattle is finding a groove finally with none other than Marshawn Lynch.
Butt's pick: Seahawks 28, Chiefs 21
Park's take: The Bengals are another frustrating team to follow. The Saints and Jimmy Graham won't need to push off a defensive back to score this time around. The Bengals lose, making the AFC North playoff picture even murkier.
Park's pick: Saints 35, Bengals 24
Butt's take: There is actually a chance for the Ravens to jump to first place in the AFC North without playing this week. This part of the equation for it to happen, happens.
Butt's pick: Saints 31, Bengals 24
Park's take: Whenever I see these two names I think of the NFC Championship Game in January, 2012. The Giants won that game in overtime thanks to Kyle Williams' gaffe.
Park's pick: 49ers 31, Giants 20
Butt's take: Despite the drama that persists in San Francisco, the 49ers have been able to post a 5-4 record. On top of that, the 49ers beat the Saints on the road last week. The Giants are reeling and the Niners pile on.
Butt's pick: 49ers 30, Giants 17
Park's take: Go Rams!
Park's pick: Broncos 42, Rams 19
Butt's take: Shaun Hill wanted to be the Rams' starter again, just after this week.
Butt's pick: Broncos 37, Rams 14
Park's take: Cheers to the days of Brad Johnson. #TBT On paper, the Redskins are the better team. Then you remember that they have looked amazing on paper since a decade ago, when names like Darrell Green and Bruce Smith adorned the roster sheet. #TBT The Redskins will struggle early but eventually. ...
Park's pick: Redskins 20, Buccaneers 14
Butt's take: Even the Redskins can't screw this one up.
Butt's pick: Redskins 24, Buccaneers 17
Park's take: The Chargers, like we've said before, struggle mightily in these divisional games. That doesn't apply here. The Raiders' win column has collected so much dust over 10 weeks they've forgotten the meaning of the word and how to even do it.
Park's pick: Chargers 41, Raiders 20
Butt's take: The Chargers are down but now out. And the running game finally gets a boost with Ryan Mathews back in action this week against one of the NFL's worst rushing defenses.
Butt's pick: Chargers 34, Raiders 10
Lions at Cardinals
Park's take: This is the easiest pick of the week. The Cardinals defense disrupts the Stafford-Megatron connection by disguising their coverages with blitz packages and vice versa. Patrick Peterson and Calais Campbell are this weekend's x-factors. The Lions own the league's best defense - I know - but this Sunday, just this Sunday, the hero Drew Stanton gets away with a dub.
Park's pick: Cardinals 28, Lions 27
Butt's take: This game could go either way, I feel like. Arizona's secondary has been thrown on at times this year, even though Patrick Peterson is back there. But if the Cardinals can protect better than they did a week ago, Drew Stanton could hit some shots downfield to Larry Fitzgerald and John Brown. Andre Ellington is what gets Arizona a win, however.
Butt's pick: Cardinals 30, Lions 28
Eagles at Packers
Park's take: As much as I love the Eagles offense, the Packers look at who's starting under center and break into tears (from laughing).
Park's pick: Packers 31, Eagles 26
Butt's take: Don't mess with the Sanchize! For real, though, Mark Sanchez has looked good the past game and a half. This game should be high-scoring, with Aaron Rodgers' Packers getting the win.
Butt's pick: Packers 38, Eagles 35
Park's take: I side with Bill Belichick when making tough decisions.
Park's pick: Patriots 24, Colts 22
Butt's take: Brady vs. Luck. Luck vs. Brady. Flipping a coin. Brady wins.
Butt's pick: Patriots 28, Colts 27
Park's take: We saw that Zach Mettenberger and the Titans only play as a group for one quarter of football. The Steelers align themselves with their once-elite status again after somebody spiked their Gatorades with who-know-what last week versus the Jets.
Park's pick: Steelers 42, Titans 15
Butt's take: Zach Mettenberger went to Oconee County High School in Watkinsville, Ga., my alma mater and town that that I grew up in. While I want him to succeed in the NFL purely for those purposes, I'm well aware he will run into some trouble Monday night.
Butt's pick: Steelers 27, Titans 21