Daniel Park: There is no other possible way to word this: I kicked our manager's last name - Butt - a few days ago. JB's chances of winning a free Chipotle meal are on the back burner, especially now that my record trails JB by three games, at 53-37-1. After going on an angry predicting spree (11-3-1), Butt should be bowing down to the Field Goal gods after Mike Nugent failed to "do his job."
In regards to me promising to "pick one dare off the comments section" and "uploading a video," the Bengals tied.
Jason Butt: So you won last week's race. Congratulations. But remember, it's a marathon, not a sprint. I am still ahead.
Park's take: My Broncos-Jets prediction last week was off by two points (31-19 was mine, as opposed to 31-17). I predict a lopsided win in Foxborough.
Park's pick: Patriots 42, Jets 14
Butt's take: Last Thursday was the first close game of the season. I don't think this week's Thursday game will be close.
Butt's pick: Patriots 27, Jets 7
Vikings at Bills
Park's take: In the battle of these two downtrodden squads, the home team takes the cake.
Park's pick: Bills 28, Vikings 21
Butt's take: There won't be too many people outside of Minneapolis and Buffalo tuning into this game. I'll flip a coin. Heads for Buffalo and tails for Minnesota. Tails it is. Go Teddy Bridgewater.
Butt's pick: Vikings 24, Bills 21
Dolphins at Chicago
Park's pick: Bears 30, Dolphins 27
Butt's take: When Jay Cutler plays mistake-free football, the Bears' offense Is as good as anyone. The defense could use some work, still. However, Chicago gets a win this week.
Butt's pick: Bears 31, Dolphins 28
Park's take: The Saints need to wooosah. Watch Bad Boys 3 with Will Smith if you didn't catch that reference. The game will be played in the Lions' den, where the Saints - unless your name is Daniel - don't survive.
Park's pick: Lions 42, Saints 34
Butt's take: The Lions have the top-ranked defense in the league. The Saints have been surprisingly average at times. Though New Orleans is coming off of a bye, Detroit's stout front seven keeps the Saints from moving the ball at the pace they'd prefer.
Butt's pick: Lions 26, Saints 21
Bengals at Colts
Park's take: Winning at Indy Land isn't as easy as people make it sound. After two slip-ups the Colts are on a frightening four-game winning streak. Bengals will need to #BengayUp on Monday.
Park's pick: Colts 44, Bengals 23
Butt's take: The Bengals were fortunate to tie Carolina last week. And to think, they actually had a chance to win, too. They won't be as fortunate this week.
Butt's pick: Colts 34, Bengals 28
Park's take: I hope the Jaguars go 0-16 this year. Johnny Manziel makes a cameo after the team goes up 21-0.
Park's pick: Browns 36, Jaguars 13
Butt's take: You won't find me picking the Jaguars at any point this season.
Butt's pick: Browns 31, Jaguars 10
Park's take: The Rams' engine. ... wait, that's too ironic. The Seahawks find themselves in a can't-lose-at-all-costs situation, while the Rams try to spoil moods.
Park's pick: Seahawks 21, Rams 20
Butt's take: Much has been made about the Seahawks' offense sputtering. That gets fixed this week. Russell Wilson and Marshawn Lynch get back to form.
Butt's pick: Seahawks 33, Rams 14
Park's take: I'm pretty upset Redskins Owner Dan Snyder had someone not from the Oneida Indian Nation sitting next to him at the game last week. #frustrated
Park's pick: Titans 27, Redskins 21 (OT)
Butt's take: Will the Redskins turn to Colt McCoy at any point during this game? Don't rule that out, it could very well happen. However, Alfred Morris gets back on track with a big game.
Butt's pick: Redskins 26, Titans 24
Park's take: The Chargers win the Super Bowl if Phillip Rivers doesn't catch frostbite.
Park's pick: Chargers 23, Chiefs 20
Butt's take: Phillip Rivers has been a machine. And even when Ryan Mathews is healthy, the Chargers may want to seriously consider making Branden Oliver their No. 1 back.
Butt's pick: Chargers 28, Chiefs 21
Giants at Cowboys
Park's take: I called them the Kings of the NFC and they proceed to cast stones of judgment at me. If the Cowboys don't win this game I will pick a dare from the comments section and YouTube it.
Park's pick: Cowboys 100, Giants 20
Butt's take: I'm not so sure I can follow that kind of entertaining prediction. I'm going with the Cowboys but I suppose I'm no showman.
Butt's pick: Cowboys 30, Giants 27
Park's take: When will the Cardinals lose? Why will they not lose?!
Park's pick: Cardinals 14, Raiders 13
Butt's take: The Raiders found some success with Derek Carr going deep to Andre Holmes. Can that continue? Sure. Can the defense stop the Cardinals? Probably not.
Butt's pick: Cardinals 27, Raiders 24
49ers at Broncos
Park's take: The Sheriff (Peyton Manning) pulls out a new bag of tricks. The Broncos defense brings its A+ game and shuts down Colin Kaepernick and Friends. Up by five with four minutes to go, the Broncos pin the 49ers deep after a punt from their 35-yard line. Aqib Talib makes a tackle for the ages, bringing down Anquan Boldin on fourth-and-three.
Park's pick: Broncos 33, 49ers 28
Butt's take: Even though the 49ers have won three in a row, something just continues to seem off with them. There won't be any room for mistakes against Peyton Manning and the Broncos this week, either.
Butt's pick: Broncos 31, 49ers 21
Park's take: The Texans should take this one-sided (like the Steelers helmet) battle with ease.
Park's pick: Texans 30, Steelers 21
Butt's take: Todd Haley might be the most hated man in Pittsburgh right now. But Ben Roethlisberger deserves some blame for having back-to-back sub-par weeks. This Monday, however, Roethlisberger finds a groove again and leads the Steelers to a win over Houston.
Butt's pick: Steelers 24, Texans 17